Channel 4 Dinosaurs?

THIS looks like the kind of movie which would have kids grinning at the prospect of guts and gore or screaming in fright and ducking behind the sofa.

The 1993 "Official Video of Dinosaurs" features 3D computer graphics and live action of the most fearsome creatures ever to walk the earth.

The Revelation Film Production, which I plucked from the vaults yesterday, was released in partnership with the Natural History Museum and billed as "the finest Dinosaur video for 65 million years."

Viewers could step back in time to walk alongside T-Rex and co by popping on a pair of futuristic shades with cardboard frames and red and blue filters.

So imagine my surprise to discover Channel 4 3D Week - a series of shows offering mind blowing footage never seen on TV thanks to - yep, you guessed it - a pair of 'futuristic' shades with cardboard frames and red and blue filters - available free from Sainsbury's.

But as I settled down to watch (minus the specs because my local store had run out) de ja vu struck as I remembered BBC1 had shot a 3D episode of EastEnders for Children in Need, also in 1993.

Furthermore, as the night wore on "The Queen In 3D" programme revealed the first ever film of this kind was "The Royal Review" shot at the 1953 Coronation and intended for cinema viewing.

Yet despite a 56 year history, techno dweebs are drooling at the prospect of Sky's high definition 3D system, previewed at August's Edinburgh Festival 2009, which hits customers' screens next year - if they own an HD box or compatible TV.

So why, after more than half a century and the invention of the cassette tape, compact disk, internet and, er - the Tamagotchi - is 3D vision being hailed as a brave new world of entertainment? If it was that groundbreaking the first time, surely it should be part of everyday life by now - or like a couple of examples listed above - old fashioned and rendered obsolete?

Admittedly I didn't have the specs, but I've heard from friends the Channel 4 shows were disorientating and nauseating - tacky at best. 3D TV sounds like a good idea, but really, the only thing it has going for it is novelty, which wears off, until everyone forgets and you can bring it back again in a roaring fanfare.

"The Royal Review" was never seen and left to gather dust in a British Film Institute stock room, despite showing colour footage of one the 20th Century's most magnificent celebrations.

The flagship EastEnders episode attracted 13 million viewers, but despite 16 years of punch-ups in the Queen Vic, no fan has ever recalled cowering behind a cushion as a projected pint glass flies out of the screen and across their living room - unless someone has spiked their TV dinner.

Meanwhile "The Official Video of Dinosaurs"? Sure it sounds cool - but if I can't remember watching it and the glasses are lost it can't have been that hard hitting. But of course, I'm running out of time to find out as VHS is almost obsolete - just like T-Rex.

Short Circuit

IT has been a while - 2009 has been a lean year for Aries the Dreamer - but with a flick of the switch it's back to business.

This is the first post in 11 months - a poor show - but there's been cutbacks. Less time for sleeping, eating, socialising, and writing. An erosion of creativity, inspiration, focus and sanity.

An accelerating cycle of work, work and more work, as the big hand sweeps across the clock's spinning circular surface like a ticking time bomb or a gilt edged guillotine.

There's been sleepless nights, scant leftovers, microwaves and takeaways, plus flaky friendships, frayed edges and time at the bar. The days, weeks and months have flown by.

But, as if submerging from a heavy hibernation, battling swollen lids, pounding temples, tired muscles and stuffy sinuses - I am back on back on track.

Leaner is meaner, and in these challenging times Aries is breaking it down, mixing it up and packaging it into byte-sized pieces - short, sharp and to the point.

With a striking new look less is more and more is less.

So let's get to dreaming...